A kink is a kink. That’s what I’ve concluded.
And no, I’m not talking about the band from the seventies. I’m talking about being a spank-o.
I think there’s no accounting for kinks. At least for me there’s not. I’ve heard of theories about some nerve that gets stimulated when you’re spanked that can have an erotic effect. Sure, I can believe that. But that doesn’t explain why I (a child who was never corporally punished) was turned on spanking my dolls as a four year old.
I have two vanilla friends who I’ve confessed my kink to and they were both kind enough to support my efforts as a fledgling author of spanking fiction by purchasing and reading Betrothed. One of my friends, who is always happy to talk about any kind of sex and has probably had more crazy public sex than anyone I know, was excited to read it.
“Maybe I’ll get turned on. Should I tell you if I do? Or should I keep that to myself?” she said.
I laughed. “No, definitely tell me. But I have a feeling you won’t. I thinking spanking is a kink you either have or you don’t.”
When I checked back in with her, she said, “You’re right. It didn’t do anything for me.” [She did give me a five star review on Blushing Books though. Thank God for friends.]
Same thing for the other friend who read it [who also left a five star review– I have to say, I nearly did a little jig when I got the first five-star review that wasn’t from someone I know!].
I don’t blame them. I mean, as open as I am to sexual experimentation, you could never get me turned on by feet. Or furries. Or golden showers. Or any of the other kinks that people have.
That said, I think it *might* be different for guys. Please post here if you have a comment about this, fellas. My husband certainly isn’t a spank-o, but it turns him on to spank me. Maybe that’s just because he knows I like it. Maybe it’s because it’s a nice view. But it seems like some guys could *learn* to be turned on by spanking. Is that true?
Any women out there who have *learned* to be turned on by a spanking? I’d love to hear about it…
Hi. The first thing I thought when I read the title was “a rose is a rose”.
Nope, didn't “learn” spanking. Hardwired to it from day one. But I'd love to hear a story of that.
Hi Renee, I agree, you just are or you're not. I was never spanked as a child either, and the interest was there as long as I can remember. But then again, my husband swears he never was, and now he definitely is, at least with me.
I'll have to check out your book! Sara
Hi Emen,
Yes, hardwired is a good way of putting it! 🙂
Thank you for posting a comment (I get so excited when I know someone was here) 🙂
Hi Sara! Right– how fortunate we are that our husbands are turned on by our kinks.
Thank you for commenting!!
never spanked as a child. but have always been turned on by the idea. so yes, definitely hardwired. My significant other hasn't always been a spanker but enjoys it with me. initially i think becos he saw how turned on i got (we started it sexually). but perhaps with the whole submission thing going on i think it's also a case of feeling the Dominance over me and liking that. (i could be entirely wrong…)
I should ask him to leave a comment here.
ooh, yes, I'd love to have a Dom comment on this… 🙂 Thank you!
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My sub and I are new to the lifestyle and are exploring everything. We have been in affair for a year and five months ago she read “50,” and suddenly understood herself, our attraction, and Me. I had to read “50,” Myself to understand what she was trying to express.
Five months ago she knelt before Me in submission, I removed My leather belt, fastened it around her neck, and we have been in a Dom/sub relationship ever since. Like all couples, we have had break downs and make-ups; but through it all, she always comes back to the fact that she is a hardwired submissive to a Master.
She, like you Rose, hated spanks in the hallway or during sex. They just offended her.
But after her submission, just the thought of Me spanking her makes her wet and moan. This surprises her because she is in her late 40s, two kids, lots of boyfriends, and a husband; and now she likes…sorry, loves spankings.
As I mentioned, I am not her husband, and she hates it when he spanks her. She only wants it from her Master. Again, weird.
I am not a sadist and never enjoyed spanking, or inflicting pain, or engaging in rough sex. I don't like doing it with anyone else but My property. If I am with My sub, I do what gives her ticket to sub-space by means of control, pain, and carnal pleasure.
She ultimately is in control by her active submission; without it, a Dom is nothing more than offender. It is a fine line, but an amazing zone to be in if you're a person of passion and enjoy pleasuring your partner.
In conclusion, you have to be hardwired for D/s lifestyle and enjoyable kink. Either you get it or you don't; and either it turns you on or it doesn't. Kink in itself, is an art form and amazing to behold when practiced by masters, both Dom and sub.
Thank you for posting, Master Charles– it's great to hear about you and your journey! I love your conclusion– so beautifully well said!!